I’ve realized that I’m very good at pretending to be alright. I’m not trying to be strong. Most of the time, it’s just easier to pretend to be okay than it is to express how I’m really feeling. I think that’s because I don’t know how I’m actually feeling. I’m stuck between several different emotions and no emotions at the same time. I know that pretending I’m okay when I’m not cannot last forever.
At some point, my emotions will come rushing back to me. It seems that I either have every emotion or no emotions, there’s no balance for me. That’s how it goes with bipolar disorder. When that happens, I know that I have a lot of support from my family and friends.
My Side of the Pole 
I feel the same, I feel so many things altogether and sometimes I dont feel anything at all! All of this is
so very confusing.
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I find that blogging and writing help me. This is the one place I don’t have to be anything other than what I am. It’s where I’m understood, no matter what I’m going through.
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I feel this way a lot of the time. The last year has been really hard for me. When I look back I can see the times that I was feeling like I was pretending or putting on a show. Not just for everyone else either, for myself too. My thoughts are with you. If you need to talk, you know where to find me. I’m a willing ear to listen.
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I also pretend for myself. It’s a way to get through the rough times. Thanks for your support.
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You’re welcome. It makes me smile when I see that you have liked something that I have written, so I guess I should say thank you to you as well. 🙂
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How wonderful that you have the support of your family and friends. I do too, but I’ve learned from attending bipolar support groups that far too many do not. I’m grateful.
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We’re both very lucky to have that support. I also see many people who don’t have support. It’s also good that we can see how lucky we are and that we can be grateful for it.
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