My day had started out rough. I was feeling extremely anxious about restarting ECT. So meeting up with friends really helped me feel a little bit more at ease. I know I should get together with friends more often, but it’s not easy for me. My depression tends to take over, making it difficult, at times, for me to leave the house at all.
I met up with some friends last night that I know from a support group I used to go to. It was hard to get myself to go there, but I was glad I went once I arrived. It’s nice to talk to and spend time with others that understand what I’m going through. We shared thoughts and stories. I was even able to laugh and smile. It felt great to do that.
Another family get-together today. It’s my step-daughter’s boyfriend’s (the father of my granddaughter) birthday today. I think he turns 27. This time I’ll be going to the gathering alone since my husband is working. I really like this guy; he’s a great father. Plus, I’m going to ask him a bunch of questions about my granddaughter since she sleeps over tomorrow night. I want to know everything about her schedule; how often she eats, when she sleeps, what helps her sleep, etc.
I set up the play pen in our bedroom yesterday. It fits perfectly. Hopefully I can borrow the high-chair from my mother-in-law and bring it home with me today. I want to be as prepared as possible.
I was at the movies with my husband yesterday when his aunt called twice in a row. Thinking it was an emergency, he stepped outside to answer the phone. It turns out that our cousins were in town for one day and they were having a get-together. However, it seems that we were the only two that weren’t told the day and time of the gathering. Our aunt was calling to see if we were going to come to the party; she said that everyone else already arrived. My husband and I discussed it and decided that it was best to go over there to see everyone, especially the ones that are in town for only a day (we really like them and rarely get to visit).
We left the theater after seeing only the first 20 minutes of the movie. We arrived and realized that even our step-kids were there. It doesn’t matter that we weren’t informed about the party. Everyone makes mistakes and forgets to inform everyone. I looked around and realized that there were 21 people at this gathering. I found a spot where my back was to the wall and I started visiting with family. For the most part, it went pretty well. I even got some time to play with my granddaughter; she is growing up so quickly.
We only stayed about 2 hours. I wanted to leave sooner, but my husband was engaged in conversation with family that he doesn’t see as often as he wants. So I found another seat where I was comfortable and waited for him to be done talking to people. I made it through my time there and even had some good (maybe even great) conversations with people. I wished we knew about the party earlier, so I could prepare myself for it, but it worked out no matter what.
I made it through another family get-together. There were only a total of 10 people, but I only knew 2 of these people. This was a long overdue family reunion. I took a Valium on my way over there, and it kicked in just in time. I automatically introduced myself to people when I arrived, which is something I would never normally do; thank you Valium. I offered to help out in the kitchen, and I ended up doing a lot. I was even hugging people when I said goodbye at the end of the night. It’s amazing what 10mg of Valium will do.
Not only is Thanksgiving just around the corner, but we’re also having a family reunion next Sunday with my father-in-law’s side of the family. My husband is helping me prepare for Thanksgiving. I now know whose house it will be at and when we have to be there. I also know that there are going to be some people I don’t know, but I will just stick by the people that I know.
There are also going to be a lot of people at the family reunion that I haven’t met. I’m nervous about it, but also excited. I’ve heard stories about these people, but never met most of them. As long as I have my husband by my side, I should be okay. The Valium will also help. It’s a lot to deal with in such a small amount of time, but I think I’ll be able to manage.
Then shortly after that, my husband and I fly to Connecticut to spend a week with my family. I’m not anxious or worried about being with my family. Actually, I’m excited to spend time with family. The only thing I worry about is the traveling; I’ve done it before, I can do it again.