As my days continue to go on, I sit here wondering if and when they will end. Life is exhausting and is often too much for me to handle. I honestly wonder how I make it through all of the “events” and each individual “crisis”. Today, I was so overwhelmed when a company said they didn’t have us scheduled for an appointment, even though the technician wrote down our appointment for us. I was so overwhelmed, frustrated, angry, and stressed that I started crying. Apparently, when I get to my breaking point, I end up crying (which I hate doing). I was able to manage the situation on my own (that’s a big deal for me). I spoke to the manager and was able to have someone keep the appointment and come out today.
In my life, there seems to be one problem after another, and another, and another, and so on. I just want a break; a few days, strung together, where problems don’t keep arising. I guess I just have to do my best to go with the flow.
All of these problems that have been coming up have been causing my blood pressure to rise. By taking in deep breaths, I was able to bring my blood pressure down 10 points, down to 146/102. For some reason, the physician’s assistant to me that I need to work on lowering my blood pressure. She told me that I need to relax. I couldn’t believe it! Was she kidding me or was she just completely ignorant? She knew all of my diagnoses. Telling someone to “just relax” is absurd. Anyway, I’m trying to bring my blood pressure down, hopefully it will work even the slightest bit.